The Hopeless Romantic

This is my blog of the daily musings of my life. The details of my thoughts and feelings as a lesbian in Sheffield. With a mad and slightly weird family, but truly blessed having found my soulmate: FT. It's not always interesting, not always happy, but always honest and true! The fight for my dreams begins!

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Rock On!!!!

Hee Hee... well, it has been a while since I posted, hasn't it? And for all those who avidly check my journal for updates (which is no one except my lady probably), here it is... a run down of the past few days, the way that I see it! Thursday: Thursday night was ace! It was the night where eager anticipation led and built up... it was the night where we finally got to put some funky clothes on, and make up (and yes, I did do mascara and foundation!) as well as some dancing shoes, and get out there and have a boogie!
I think both FT and myself were well up for it! FT had her last training session, and was going for drinks with her fellow trainees after, so I said I'd meet her in the pub. So I met Dora in Broomhill, on a very windy evening, and we headed down to the Walkabout (which I wasn't impressed with the thought of, but as it turned out, it couldn't have been a better choice of venue). Whilst in the Walkabout, we ordered drinks... and to my excitement, being an Aussie bar, they had VB (a favourite from my days as a London Broncos season ticket holder)! And the first bottle went down a storm, and in a few minutes. The next thing I know, Doofus is ringing me on her phone, informing me the bouncers won't let her in cos she has a hoodie on... even though the hood won't fit over her head! And they were refusing to let her in carrying it! Nevermind, DL and Dora to the rescue! Dora put the hoodie in her bag for the Doof, and good time having was restored, with another trip to the bar, and another VB! I also had a Smirnoff Ice waiting for my lady when she arrived from her training with a few new people in tow. Am I a devoted girlfriend or what?! By this point, I was getting quite merry! And after something like another couple of drinks, and the departure of everyone from training, me, FT, Dora and Doofus headed off to Fuel! Only Doofus, still shattered from working at the weekend, gave hugs and stuff, and dep;arted, leaving just the three of us to go and boogie! Inside, we got more drinks (what can I say... £1 a bottle on a Thursday!) and met up with SM and Amy, and all was ace, getting a little tipsy... well alright then, pissed, and having a good time. I was well up for a good time, and that was abundantly obvious when I began singing at the top of my voice, and jumping up and down, when they played Since U Been Gone by Kelly Clarkson! Everyone followed suit and we boogied on the dance floor! The night pretty much followed the same pattern, of group dancing, somewhat more provocative dancing between me and my lady (Yeah baby!!!! - Some more of that at climax please ;)!!!) And more alcohol! I was well on the way to complete anubriation, and somehow managed to lose £20 which Dora entrusted to me to look after! But who in their right mind gives a drunk person money to look after? Hmmm, still, aside from the fact that it cost me £20 through my own drunken stupidity, on the good side, I was too pissed to notice it going, and today, it seems like a distant memory! Plus, it was such a good night, that I wouldn't have minded spending £20 extra anyway! We stayed until the end!!! I can't believe we stayed until the end! I've never done that before (Woo Hoo) It was soooooo wicked! And they even played a slow song at the end, which my mrs and I danced too while everyone got their coats and stuff!
Yeah baby!!!! I really wanted a kebab on the way home... but the place was too damn packed (the trouble with leaving at the end of the night and not before), so we just shared a cab home, all 5 of us. Well... what a fucking retard! The driver was a bloody kamakazi taxi driver! And a wanker at that! I swear, he was doing like 50-60 mph in a 30 mph zone, and slamming on his breaks at the last minute! It's a wonder we didn't die! It was that bad, that we got out half way home and caught a different taxi back! What a tosser! Still reeling from the desire for a kebab, and stuff, my lady made me some chilli and garlic bread... bless her! I think without that, I'd have puked for sure! She's wonderful my girlfriend, and I've never felt more loved and happy in all my life! Friday: Well, this was a typical 'recovering' morning after the night before! We woke up at a reasonable time, but too bloody early when you consider we didn't get to bed until gone 3am! We cuddled for a bit, and made love (which has to be an ultimate hangover cure... it makes the world seem a better place again), and then snuggled up and went back to sleep until gone midday. It was weird, but fortunate as I had to drive, that my lady, although drank much less than me the night before, had a much worse hangover! And we couldn't motivate ourselves to leave to visit her parents in Stoke for the weekend until getting on for 4pm. And considering we had initially said we'd be there in the afternoon, we were well late... and FT's mum wasn't impressed. But we were too hungover to care! We arrived in Stoke and had barely ordered chinese from the most amazing take away you could ever wish to experience and were tucking into it when FT's lil sister turned up to visit! Bless her heart, she's sweet and adorable, but isn't like a shy timid type that will sit and watch TV with you, she likes to be active, and liked to be tickled and things like that, which is really cool just not when you have a hangover! I must admit, I was more subdued than I usually am with her, but poor FT was really feeling the effects of the hangover and seemed like she just wanted to sleep! Despite all that, it's not often we get to see her sister, so it was really cool, and I get a taster of what FT was like when she was younger, and what our kids will be like in the future, so I really enjoyed it! I think her sister is ace and I seem to get the seal of approval, so I'm not complaining! We retired to bed fairly early on the Friday night, and were glad of the chance to properly recharge and have a much needed sleep! Saturday: We woke up at 9am... which by our standards, is an early rise for a weekend! But we had lots too do, as it was my chance to be intriduced to members of FT's family I hadn't yet met.
So I awoke feeling a little aprehensive, as I always feel I make a bad first impression as I'm usually quite shy! Yes, usually, behind this fiery interior is a shy, extremely sensitive side, contrary to popular belief! FT's mum departed for work at around 9:45 ish, and we had the day to ourselves, which FT was looking forward too, and I felt a little less nervous for that fact too... would be a complete nightmare showing myself up in front of the future mother-in-law! She makes me nervous enough as it is, so eager am I to make a good impression all of the time!
Anyway, here's where the events of the day veer from the track of family visiting and take a different twist. I don't think I commented on the events of christmas between my lady and me, and our families, and I can't remember if she did or not, or to what extent, but FT and her mum had a fairly huge, ok, really huge, fall out over christmas, which resulted on FT ringing me in tears on christmas night and boxing day. Anyway, I felt completely helpless, as she was in Stoke, and I was in London with my family, and I've never felt so helpless in all my life. What do you do when you have the one person in the world who you care so much about, so upset, but there is jack shit you can do about it? Anyway, FT's mum 'resolved' the issue, and as anyone who reads FT's journal will know, that 'resolved' in this sense takes on a very liberal meaning. In anycase, my only reason for mentioning it, is in explanation or the reason why we spent a while Saturday morning putting a lock on FT's bedroom door at home without mentioning it to her mum. Anyway, that's what we did, so we could both feel happier about it if a situation were to arise where she had to go and stay at her mum's house without me. All the time, I'm feeling incredibly nervous, cos no one in their right mind wants to actively piss off the future in-laws, yet I'm very aware that's probably exactly what I'm doing. But then in saying that, there is no way in this life time or the next would I feel happy with FT going home to visit her parents and being in the same situation at christmas. So the lock seemed the logical solution, and is exactly why we put it on. Even though I spent the day in fear of her mum completely going off her nut about it.
But FT seemed a lot lot happier when it was on, which made it all worth while (plus, like I need an excuse to use my electric drill/screwdriver?! It's ace!!!). With the lock firmly in place, we headed off to see FT's Uncle John, Auntie Pat and cousin Katie. Yikes... I hadn't met them before Saturday, and got very stressed trying to follow FT's mum's directions... which were diabolical! She sent me right at a set of traffic lights I should have turned left at, which had me completely in the other side of town! Hmm, I was stressed and nervous, not a good combination! But we got there in the end, safe and sound! It was nice meeting some more of FT's family, and I tried not to be too shy, although I think I was! I did feel honoured to be introduced to them, and FT informs me that the liked me, which I'm relieved about! We spent an hour and a half there, watching DVDs of when FT was little and all of her birthday parties and school events, which was nice... she was the most admorable little girl in the world! And it made me incredibly broody, thinking 'wow... this is gonna be what our babies are like!' After a while, we were on our way, with incredibly good directions, to FT's cousin Laura's house to visit, Laura, her Auntie Pauline and lil baby Callum. Not forgetting of course, Benson the dog! We had lunch there, and a chat and made a fuss of the very cute dog, and held and made cooing noises at the even cuter baby... making us both even more broody! There's something about seeing my lady with a baby in her arms that just gives me goose bumps and makes me smile! I just get the feeling of 'I just can't wait to see you sitting there holding our baby!' Yes... I'm a soppy romantic sod, haven't you gathered that by now?! From Laura's, we headed off, with amazing directions I might add! To Newcastle town centre, to buy a card and present for FT's Dad! A little while later, with 2 cards and a bluetooth adaptor for his computer in tow, we departed for a visit to FT's Uncle Ian's. There we tried some lemon cous cous cake (yes you heard right) that FT's Auntie Bev made, which was unusual to say the least, and chatted to Uncle Ian and FT's two cousins (which on the contrary make me not broody to say the least) for a bit, and then drove back to FT's mum's house. There we visited FT's next door neighbours for a bit, and then went and got ready and went our for a curry with FT's Dad for his birthday. Which was really nice, and it was obvious that FT made her Dad's day by coming home for the weekend, which was lovely to see! We went to bed fairly early again, not wanting to be lectured about the lock, even though we were both nervous about it the whole day, but both glad nothing was mentioned. I felt like crap and helpless lying in bed though, cos FT was upset about how things are with her mum, what with it being the first visit back since christmas, and there is nothing I can do to make any of that better, other than show her I'm here for her, and have my arms open for lots of cuddles and be there to hold her when she needs me. I just feel so helpless, and I hate seeing her like that! We eventually went to sleep with her spooning me, but she had a fitful night. Sunday: We got up fairly early on Sunday, as we had one last visit to do before setting off home for Sheffield. Only FT's mum wasn't working, and she ended up coming with us to visit FT's Auntie Margaret, and cousin Mel. Her cousin Scarlett was there too, although a little shy, was an absolute little cutie. So now I was even more shy and reserved than usual, because as I have explained, the thought of making an absolute tit of myself in front of the future mother-in-law scares me stupid! So I didn't say much. Mind you, neither did FT, which I could tell she was pissed off by, as her mum was catching up on gossip and all sorts, and for quite a while, FT sat there with both of us worrying that time was getting on, we hadn't eaten, and neither of us wanted to leave late because there was bad snow all around Sheffield and Stoke, and we wanted a safe, leisurly drive home. After a couple of hours we headed back for some food, and a quick 'goodbye' with FT's dad and the little love that is Beby Hound (who should have been coming with us, but was a little poorly so had to stay and go to the vets) and we were on our way, via the motorway to avoid the snow and icy roads. An hour and fifty minutes later, we were home in Sheffield, and it was nice to be back! FT was visibly relieved to be back home, and to have some space from her mum again, and be back in her own space. I couldn't be arsed to cook anything, and we thought we'd finish the weekend in good style by having a take away! So good old Friary chips and chicken nuggets, and a kebab split between the pair of us! I thought that'd make her feel a bit better... only feeling a little frustrated at how crap and unable to do anything to help her I was, I tried to put the food on a tray, but the box broke, and I raised my voice, saying I was 'just trying to help', and FT burst into tears. Bugger the food! I left it where it was, and held her there and then in my arms for 5 minutes, knowing she'd feel better after crying for a bit. And that worked. I think she felt a bit better after that, and we sat and watched the first episode of the second series of 24 on DVD. The world seemed good again, and we both needed to get back to normality! And spending time together tucking into a nice meal definetely achieves that! It was lovely to get into our own ed, settle down and have cuddles! Much needed! Monday: FT had the day off uni yesterday, and we had a nice lie in and just spent a fairly leisurly relaxing day... yet it was full of good news for a change! Firstly, we found out that Beby Hound is OK, nothing major and he should be 'right as ninepence' to come and stay with us next week (as FT's dad put it, bless him!). Secondly, I heard back from the interview I went for last week, and my file has been cleared, and I can start work as a teaching assistant for this agency as and when there is something to do! So Woo Hoo! Go Me Go Me! It will be good to have some money coming in!
Also, as of yesterday, this relationship became FT's longest relationship ever... which put a HUGE smile on my face, as I know we've had shit to deal with, and things haven't always been smooth sailing, but things are better now than they ever have been, and things just keep going from strength to strength! Life is good! Nope... better than good... It's FUCKING AMAZING!!! Also, I'm not a particularly superstitious type, but someone out there is shining down on us, as Today, I bought tickets for the monthly club night Climax at the union (we missed the last one being entertained by Kelly Clarkson), and we ended up getting tickets number 8 and 9. Where 8 happens to be our special, lucky number... so it's more than coincidence that we managed to get that lucky ticket! Woo Hoo... as it happens, I can't wait to go to Climax on Friday! I love climaxing with my lady! In more ways than one! ;) But it's amazing!!!! Now off to cook some food, cos I'm bloody starving! Until next time, my faithful journal readers...

1 Comments:

  • At 9:37 am, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Super color scheme, I like it! Good job. Go on.
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